Sweeney Todd Only WISHES He Was Erik

For my musical theatre class, we have to watch Sweeney Todd. Now, don't get me wrong, I love good theatre, I love Steven Sondheim, and I love Angela Lansbury, but there's just something about Mr. Todd that I don't like. Never have, never will. So I'm not too happy about having to watch it.

On the other hand, I don't know that there's been a time in my life where I've had to struggle so hard not to giggle while in class. I mean come on. This dude is so ridiculously overdramatic. "The world wronged me and now I have to seek revenge by killing everyone." Seriously?

And then I realized something.

Sweeney Todd is basically Erik but way less cool.

Like, if Erik wasn't deformed, he would be Sweeney Todd. He would still be all angry and murdery except he wouldn't look like his face went through a meat grinder and instead of a barber he would be a composer.

Also, I'm pretty sure that Sweeney Todd might be Erik's long-lost brother/half-brother. He has this obsession with blonde women, and all he can say is how beautiful his wife was. Now flash forward to Love Never Dies and the creepy little spawn of Christine and Erik, Gustave, as he sings with his dear old daddy in "Beauty Underneath." The following is a completely accurate paraphrase of both characters in their respective shows:

Sweeney: AND SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL OH SO BEAUTIFUL OH YES SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL AND BEAUTIFUL AND DID I MENTION THAT THE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN WIFE BEAUTY WAS MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE BEAUTIFUL

Gustave: I THINK IT'S BEAUTIFUL OH YES IT'S BEAUTIFUL THIS BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL THING THAT IS BEAUTIFULLY BEAUTIFUL I THINK IT IS JUST SO BEAUTIFUL IN ITS BEAUTIFUL BEAUTY





I think I've proved my point.

~Kylie


P.S. Also I forgot to explicitly state that even though he supposedly fathered the creepiest child in the history of musical theatre, Erik is still the best sociopath in the history of... well, ever.